When we first moved to Argentina it was in the middle of a cold and dark winter. There were so many things that were different and after so many years of feeling reasonably competent and intelligent, I felt completely incompetent and unintelligent. Most of the time, I could press forward with hope that one day I would understand what people were saying and one day I would be able to do a lot of little things that seemed beyond me at that time.
One particularly dark day, I decided that Tricia was going to come and visit me. I even went to the online calendar for her children’s school and decided that she was going to come on the 24th of October. After that, whenever I was having a particularly challenging time, I would think about Tricia coming and I would imagine what it would be like and it helped me…a lot.
October 24th came and went. She didn’t come. In the end, I figured that it was a blessing to have had hope when things were so hard for me. I felt a little embarrassed at myself. But then I started thinking about hope and the place that it has in my life. I decided that even though my hope was in vain, it still gave me strength and for that I was ever so grateful.
A couple of days later, when I was talking to Tricia on the phone, I told her about my vain hope. I tried to explain how it had helped me. She told me something like she thought that it was good as long as it didn’t depress me when it didn’t work out. I explained that I personally was doing so much better now, and that I wasn’t depressed because I knew that the hope had helped.
Three days later, she showed up in Argentina, having purchased her ticket clear back in August. I wrote about her arrival on our mission blog:
But what I want to add to that story is what she actually said,
“Mom! Don’t give up hope…I’m here!”
After all is said and done, I can easily imagine Heavenly Father saying the same thing. And I know that He is here. He has helped me overcome a myriad of challenges and cope with things that cannot be changed. I have felt His presence in my life more strongly and directly than ever before. I am so thankful that because of the atonement of the Savior, I have Hope.